We were on our way to a work-lunch on a Friday, 5 cramped in a car… when a topic came up on retirement and Work-Life Balance. Someone asked – When is enough, enough? Somehow the discussion topic changed, and we never concluded the discussion.

The question stayed stuck in my mind all through the weekend, and I want to share my perspectives on this. Clearly this is a very subjective yardstick and there is no universal answer which works for everyone. The question itself is wide open. “Enough” could reference to almost anything we deal with on a daily basis. So I will let everyone dwell on what ‘Enough’ references to their individual situation. Our discussion reference for ‘Enough’ was – when have you saved ‘Enough’ to start thinking of your sunset years and stop working so hard to please someone else – and start noticing the wonderful world around you, in the little time you have left.

I know some very good people, who have done well for themselves (either their own successful startups, or early stage involvement with tech startups) – who still feel driven to continue working 60-70 hours a week. Perhaps their DNA is wired differently…. Perhaps they have an incessant need to prove something to themselves, or to some Parent figure in their lives. I also have friends who have made their choice of ‘when Enough is Enough’ and have shifted focus on their Work-Life Balance, their families, and their own personal needs. There is no right or wrong here, or any judgmental attempt to identify norms. Each one has to figure out what is right for themselves. The important point is …. Hit PAUSE in your busy lives, and do think about it.

Individual upbringing, personal life choices and beliefs will also drive your decision. For most of the tech world in the US, this is particularly true. There is the additional bar to cross….. Most of us have gone through uncertain periods, as we made the transition to a new workspace – feel the need to achieve more and more. One more bar to cross, hurdle to clear as an insatiable need; again based on how we are wired.

Everyone needs to undergo their own objective assessment, of their own situation. What I can share, based on my own experience is:

  • When you ask yourself this question – ‘Enough’ should relate to your needs in retirement and not taking care of your children, forever.
  • If you have done the right things, and ensured your kids have been provided the right tools of a good education and upbringing….. Then, they will take care of themselves, as you did for yourself. The ‘Enough’ should not factor in leaving behind a full estate for your kids.
  • My experience is, that if at (Retirement-5) years, (1) you are free of all debt, (2) you have religiously contributed month-over-month to your 401-K account, (3) you have a savings nest egg on the side, (4) you have ensured your kids are well equipped to face the world (as you did) and are independent…… you have reached your ‘Enough’ milestone. Start shifting into a lower gear (slower speed, but still have the power) and take stock of your life
  • Reaching your ‘Enough’ milestone only means that you make changes in your life, where the focus shifts from taking care of everyone to taking care of YOU. You and your partner make a plan to identify ahead in time this milestone, and on reaching it – make necessary lifestyle changes to start enjoying your life. The urge to continue for some more time on your ‘comfort zone path’ and kick the decision can down the road, may come at a far greater cost later…. As there are no guarantees in life. To each, their own…. No one else will decide for you

As you read this, you might say to yourself…. This is not for me. I have lots of working-years ahead of me. That may be true…. But recognizing that you have to define your “Enough’ Milestone is still necessary. It puts a plan in place and at least provides some clarity for the future….