This is indeed a loaded question and should not elicit a binary YES/NO answer….. Rather, it should kick off an introspection of a multitude of complex issues – at the end of which, you may still not have a crisp response.

Another point to note – the fact that someone even asks you this question, is a good thing. Someone cares about your emotional well-being and is concerned enough, to even ASK. How many other of us go through life, struggling with this question and without any answers.

Although difficult to face up….. I would ask everyone to self-evaluate and attempt to find out their “state-of-happiness”. WHY? Because, if this core need is unfulfilled one lives through their physical existence always chasing the next shiny toy, to achieve happiness. Physical needs are important to take care of….. the intangible, meta-physical needs extend through your spiritual self, your past, present and future. This is where some of your answers lie – which only you can explore and answer. Identify what makes you ‘really happy’ and attempt to structure your life to ensure you do not neglect this in your daily routine.

We are all social beings and do not live on our own islands. We interact with a multitude of people…. Starting with our own family members, our friends and colleagues, our work-families and a host of day-to-day, sometimes meaningless contacts. In all cases, even if we do not have any specific ‘interactions/transactions’ we are still sharing our aura/mood/intangible behavior space – and in that process, rubbing off each other our happiness index. Think of the time, when a casual water cooler discussion left you slightly more distraught than before the interaction. And think back, on how you always enjoy being in the company of certain friends….. whom, “you really like”. My perspective – these are your friends who have a high happiness index, which rubs on you – in turn making you leave feeling good, every time you meet them, even though nothing has really changed on your side.

This is why it is extremely important to be cognizant of your happiness index. If you are not ‘happy’ nothing else matters. Your job, your professional position, your bank-balance, etc. are inconsequential, if you are not at peace with yourself. In my book, this is a key component of your happiness index. Happiness starts from within you, to be everlasting and to permeate your personality. You, alone have the power to make yourself feel happy. Others may cause an occasional blip in your index, with their behavior/interaction…. But you alone, can decide to be really happy.

My guidance to anyone would be — Everything that matters to you, will fall in 2 categories:

  1. What is in your control, and,
  2. What is out of your control…. like the stock market, the elected party/government, the weather, etc… etc….

Put all your energy/effort into successfully executing on (1), and making a difference. This will make you happy. When you spend too much effort musing over what you cannot control…. It will add to your unhappiness, as you cannot change them anyway.

Another point I often think about….Be happy now, in the present. When you stream through a really good feeling experience, savor the moment, and add this to your happiness index. This will probably not last forever, but will tide you through other trying times, and help create more happiness balance. Worrying, about being happy forever after – is like chasing the proverbial pot of gold at the end of the beautiful rainbow. Enjoy the moment and add it to your good karma

Other factors which may help you gauge your happiness index, are answers to some of the following questions:

  • Are you generally grateful of everything you have… or always are expecting more?
  • Are you often content and satisfied…. Or are you more often in disagreements?
  • Are you at peace with yourself… do you have peace of mind?
  • Do you have a positive attitude of optimism, or is the glass always half empty?

Perhaps you can add more questions to this list, based on your experiences….

What I’d like to leave everyone with is – I know of very well-to-do friends/families who are still chasing happiness. I also know of several friends/families (back in India, my 2nd winter home) who, by US standards, would be living below the poverty line – but have managed to understand what happiness is all about. They have enriched their meager existence with a full radiant life of happiness. Between this wide spectrum, find your happiness index spot and as per the Vulcan salute — “live long and prosper” forever. Ameen/Amen.